hold

hold me

before i wake up

before this numbness is gone

and i can feel again

hold me

so that these memories don’t come back

so that these bruises don’t reappear

like flowers blooming on my hips

the evidence of my nightmare

hold me

so that i am trapped in this dream

this numbness is my safe haven

all i want is to lie here

mid-way to death

before your hands force me to life again.

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open

you make me feel

like your fingers are peeling open my mind

turning it inside out

forcing my nails across a chalkboard

leaving white trails

a warning

a taste

of everything that is to come.

coloursĀ 

brown

blue

green

they were all so beautiful

in your hair

they reminded me of sunshine

and of green pastures

and i could only watch

as another

flooded it with fire.

table

there is a photograph

on the table

beside the yellow window

and this table is bent

from the middle

bent from the weight

with cracks lining its legs

and fungus rotting its insides

there is a table that stands

besides the yellow window

and the table is so much like me.