love me enough to hurt

there’s always the question –
do i excite you?
do i make you feel things you have never felt before?
do i hold you?
do i kiss you?
do i go on coffee dates and movie nights with you?
do i make you ache inside?
do i make you feel broken when i am gone?
do i?
there’s always the question –
do i make you love me enough to hurt you?


hold me

before i wake up

before this numbness is gone

and i can feel again

hold me

so that these memories don’t come back

so that these bruises don’t reappear

like flowers blooming on my hips

the evidence of my nightmare

hold me

so that i am trapped in this dream

this numbness is my safe haven

all i want is to lie here

mid-way to death

before your hands force me to life again.



between the lines 

on every page


between the words

that you said

i lost myself. 





they were all so beautiful

in your hair

they reminded me of sunshine

and of green pastures

and i could only watch

as another

flooded it with fire.


Your words feel

like sinking into a pillow

of clouds

at the end of a long day

like rising out of an abyss

into normality

like everything I have ever done 

has led me

to this moment,

to this burning, aching desire.


I am standing 

at the precipice 

of the ocean

and the sky,

at the point

where they merge

and you can’t tell the difference anymore.

when you kiss me


trace your finger

on my lips

like a dewdrop

running down the side of a leaf

at the dawn of creation.